WE WERE WATCHING THIS MOVIE IN GYM AND THE MAIN CHARACTER WAS LIKE “I’M TIRED AND HUNGRY AND HORNY” AND ME AT THIS OTHER CUTE GUY IN THE BACK JUST BOTH GO “SAME” AND LOOK AT EACH OTHER AND I WINKED AND EVERYONE WAS SO UNCOMFORTABLE BUT I WAS LAUGHING REALLY HARD AND THIS IS WHY I DONT HAVE FRIENDS
can we have a tumblr marriage for you guys?
IM ACTUALLY CRYING
There should be a show called “You’ll Never Find Out” where each week there’s a new story with a new set of characters and it always ends on a cliffhanger.
Well hello there satan
NO BUT THEN IN THE SEASON FINALE THEY HAVE LIKE 3 MINUTE SPOTS TO SHOW THE CONCLUSIONS FOR ALL THE STORIES
AND PLOT TWIST: All those unconnected stories? They connect like puzzle pieces in the end.
SOMEBODY MAKE THIS HAPPEN
GUYS ITS 2:AM AND I FORGOT WHAT OATMEAL MEANT AND I THOUGHT IT WAS AN EMOTION AND I SAID OUTLOUD “IM FEELING VERY OATMEAL” BUT IT DIDN’T MAKE SENSE, SO I LOOKED UP OATMEAL, BUT I SPENT 20 MINUETS CONTEMPLATING IF IT ACTUALLY WAS AN EMOTION AND IF GOOGLE WAS LYING
this text post is so oatmeal
i hate you
Ever since that episode of Sherlock I’ve been super careful about putting my charger in my phone because if I leave a bunch of scuffmarks on there and I die some little asshole is going to call me an alcoholic and they’ll feel so smug about it and that just makes me mad
HOW TO SURVIVE A HEART ATTACK WHEN ALONE
Let’s say it’s 6.15pm and you’re going home (alone of course), after an unusually hard day on the job. You’re really tired, upset and frustrated. Suddenly you start experiencing severe pain in your chest that starts to drag out into your arm and up into your jaw. You are only about five miles from the hospital nearest your home. Unfortunately you don’t know if you’ll be able to make it that far. You have been trained in CPR, but the guy that taught the course did not tell you how to perform it on yourself..!!
NOW HOW TO SURVIVE A HEART ATTACK WHEN ALONE…
Since many people are alone when they suffer a heart attack, without help, the person whose heart is beating improperly and who begins to feel faint, has only about 10 seconds left before losing consciousness.
However, these victims can help themselves by coughing repeatedly and very vigorously.
A deep breath should be taken before each cough, and the cough must be deep and prolonged, as when producing sputum from deep inside the chest.
A breath and a cough must be repeated about every two seconds without let-up until help arrives, or until the heart is felt to be beating normally again.
Deep breaths get oxygen into the lungs and coughing movements squeeze the heart and keep the blood circulating.
The squeezing pressure on the heart also helps it regain normal rhythm. In this way, heart attack victims can perhaps buy precious time to get themselves to a phone and dial 911.
Rather than sharing another joke please contribute by broadcasting this which can save a person’s life!
Be prepared and become part of the solution. Get your free next-of-kin notification card today. Click here: https://www.InCaseOfEmergencyCard.com/
major signal boost
Reblogging cause this could save someone’s life
- Failing a test you studied really hard for
- Getting replaced in a friendship
- Getting ignored
- Having something that you’re looking forward to, get cancelled
- Having to fight back tears in front of people
- Finding out that the person you like, likes someone else
- Showing your parents something you’re proud of only to get a disinterested reply
That last one always breaks my heart.